Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Climate Change Pre-nuptial Pairings

The temperatures are still bouncing ten to fifteen degrees either side of the freezing point of the ubiquitous combination of two parts hydrogen and one part oxygen, but it is becoming increasingly evident that spring is just around the corner here at the northern end of southern nowhere. Don't need a groundhog to tell the Colonel what's gonna happen outside amongst the flora and fauna. Daily security patrols throughout the Eegeebeegee Area of Operations provide the Colonel all the information needed to develop an intelligence picture of the seasonal shift shuffling in from stage left.

The earliest clues of the coming climate change are the anticipatory avian antics discernible by the Colonel's ornithological observations. There's a whole lot of sky-dancing going on. The elder members of a resident flock of canada geese have paired up and split off from the cackling crowd to begin a honking hookup that will ultimately result in an increase of goose poop on putting greens. A pair of red-tailed hawks entertained the Colonel yesterday with their high altitude circling and crying, the male soaring skyward and then tucking wings for a mouth-dropping dive to impress ladyhawk with his daring-do. Even the members of the Caw Crew have extended their raucous reveille to a day-long cacophony of mating proposals.

But there is one undeniable hint of the coming of spring: the shelves in the sporting goods department at Wally World are loaded with supplies for turkey season. There'll be six more weeks of frustratingly cold weather before the six frustrating weeks of the spring turkey season arrive.
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