The comely and kind-hearted Miss Brenda begins her [number censored]th air-breathing trip 'round ol' Sol today. Born in the year [number censored], the Colonel's Lady has been witness to momentous marvels and marvelous moments in the history of man on this big blue marble.
During her time on the planet:
Two territorial possessions of the Republic were granted Statehood.
Men walked on the moon.
Al Gore invented the Internet and founded a false religion.
The Cold War ended.
The Culture War began.
Elvis died. Or did he?
Saddam did the stupid. Three times.
Walter Mondale lost 49 states. Ronald Reagan found them.
Ole Miss won a National Championship in football. Really.
The United States gave away a canal it built on the isthmus of Panama to a country it created on territory taken from Colombia.
The United States invaded Cuba, Grenada, Panama, Iraq, and Afghanistan to depose/arrest their leaders. Four out of five ain't bad.
More than just a passive witness, the comely and kind-hearted Miss Brenda has been a trend-setter and over-achiever from the moment she and her twin sister disembarked from my favorite mother-in-law.
She is a world traveler.
She graced the new state of Hawaii with her pre-school presence; lived in Washington, California, New York, New Jersey, and Tennessee as a kid; and then, as a teen, landed in the Panama Canal Zone happily coincident (dare we call it serendipity?) with the arrival of the Colonel to that tropic.
As spousal support unit to her Marine, the Colonel's Lady has made spartan dwellings happy homes in Virginia (twice), North Carolina (twice), Mississippi (twice), Georgia, Alabama, Hawaii, Rhode Island, South Korea, South Carolina, and Florida -- in all, EIGHTEEN different abodes adopted and adapted to serve as wonderful, welcoming homes for the Colonel and kids.
She is an organizer par-excellence.
No church, community, club, school, nor business has experienced her membership without fundamental transformation -- for the good. Even the Colonel's hen herd has been subject to her organizational will -- eggs are laid with precision placement and perfunctory punctuality.
She is a consummate care-giver.
The Colonel's Lady is so constantly concerned with the comfort and confidence of others, that the Colonel's numerical call-sign for the comely and kind-hearted Miss Brenda is "Twelve" -- she always feels the need to "tend to" others.
The Colonel feels the need to pause as this juncture for the benefit of the 'Bama and LSU grads among the two dozen of you who regularly waste valuable rod and cone time perusing posts hereon, and explain the punchline in the preceding paragraph. The Colonel will attempt to use the smallest words he can.
Her nickname is "Twelve" because she thinks she must tend to (ten two) others.
The comely and kind-hearted Miss Brenda is a talented musician.
She plays the piano and plucks the Colonel's heartstrings. She is the Colonel's angel -- often up in the air harping about something or another the Colonel has done, or hasn't.
The comely and kind-hearted Miss Brenda loves the Colonel. The Colonel reminds her of this often...
...often coincident with the purchase of a new gun or power tool.
He could go on and on, but suffice it to say the comely and kind-hearted Miss Brenda is the Colonel's favorite person in the whole wide world.
Happy Birthday, Miss Brenda!