Monday, October 27, 2008

Monday Morning MOTOs, Vol. I, Ed. 4

Finding examples of mastery of the obvious (MOTO) is the least challenging thing I do each week. We are literally barraged in every medium by statements demonstrating a stranglehold on surety. So much to reward, so little to give.

The Colonel's Monday Morning MOTO Bronze goes to my Rebels' new coach. With less than two minutes left in the game, Ole Miss had a 23 to 14 lead and the Rebel (ahem) faithful in the crowd began taunting the home crowd by chanting the name of the Razorbacks' old coach. A minute later, the score was 23 to 21, Arkansas had recovered an on-side kick, and come within a questionable offensive pass interference call of achieving a come-from-behind win. When asked about it later, Houston Nutt opined that, "they probably started that a little early." Frankly, Rebel Nation has a bad call to thank for rescuing us from the all-too familiar last-minute close loss. This Saturday that shoe was on a pig's foot.

The MOTO silver goes to the junior senator from Arizona, Jon Kyle, who told the Arizona Daily Star that, "Unfortunately, I think John McCain might be added to that long list of Arizonans who ran for president but were never elected." The Republican Party is headed for a historic defeat and it is entirely their fault. You can't get re-elected on a conservative platform if you don't govern as conservatives when you get in power. That sort of bait and switch only works for the Democrats.

This morning's MOTO gold medal is awarded to Senator Joe Biden, whose medal count is approaching Michael Phelps', for his non-answer to the reporter who asked the difference between Karl Marx's wealth redistribution philosophy and Barrack Obama's. Said Senator Biden, "Is this a joke?"

Took the words right out of my mouth, Senator.

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